Starting young.

[clouddragon]

I was sad to find out that one of my students who is only 12 has decided not to continue his martial arts journey. It's sad because he was doing so well and had reached a national competition level with his Wudang spear ,winning Silver on several occasions and we had began to work on the broad sword as our next venture. I would say he had bags of natural talent and was at the ideal age to really reach high levels in the future. I didn't put any pressure on him and I didn't force him into competition or anything like that. It's a real shame as I don't get too many young ones come to train and especially not with his ability. So my thread is really about how do we keep these young gifted ones interested? The more we get into the martial arts game or any sport/activity the less on the streets getting into trouble. I wish I had started at such a young age.

[ashley]

I'm sorry to hear that news.

Let me say that this youngster might well be back, whether it is weeks, months or years, in the end I think there is a good chance he will return to martial arts.

Did he give a reason why he was leaving? Perhaps he is changing to another style?

The problem is with children, if the parents push them too much to do something, the rebellious part of their mind tells them they want to do the opposite, regardless of whether its good or bad for them.

There are things my parents used to tell me to do and organise classes and lessons for me but at the time I would have preferred not do do them just because my friends were not doing them, or I felt like I was being pushed into it.

These activities that I am talking about, now that I am older, I regret not pursuing further very much and if i think to myself what would have kept me in that activity longer would have been a better balance between being pushed, but not too hard and other factors such as friends also participating.

Having friends doing the same activity creates both a little competition between them and also more enjoyment. Otherwise they can feel like they are losing out on being with friends too.

Did he give any reason why he didn't want to continue?

[clouddragon]

He has started doing another activity with a friend. Apparently they spend many hours on computer games and he started to miss class so could play games at his mates house. He is also a good footballer too and plays for a local team, I hope he doesn't stop that also, would be a great shame and a waste of talent. To be honest he was getting into fights and was aggressive to his mother, the martial arts training was changing his character, he was polite with good manners, very respectful to me and all the members of the school. I have seen many come and go over the years and it is always a shame when the ones with ability decide to quit.

[SimonB]

Computer games seem to be taking over todays society in you people. Martial Arts v computer games? hmm I wonder which is better!

Like ashley said, this guy might be back and it's just a phase, but it does seem a waste.

Maybe when for the kids you teach you can offer them a referal prizes/discounts. If they have mates who come to the club they are much more likely to stay in the long term.

[Medway Tai Chi Society]

A book that my teacher wrote tells the story of a young boy who leaves his family and travels far into the mountains to find a teacher of the warrior arts.

Upon reaching the foothills, he meets an elderly man sleeping beneath a tree.
The man directs the boy further on to where he will meet his first teacher.
As the man leaves, he calls back to the boy:

"And one more thing...." the voice floated back through the trees, "if you slip from the path, don't worry... it happens to everyone!"

If the young man who has left your class is truely passionate about his martial training, he will come back to it later. It may be that he has to experience other things first, and these things will put his previous training into perspective. Then, when he is ready, he may come back.

Be happy that you have given him some skills that make him confident enough to go out and experience life.

[clouddragon]

I guess we try our best. I am hoping my son of two and daughter of three will one day fly the Cloud Dragon flag . Lily had her first push hands match at this mornings class lol.. and little George attacked everyone with a wooden sabre, he is so funny to watch as he keeps sinking into horse stance before he launches an attack. They have kind of been born inside the teachers door so are in a good position to start their journey or shall we say start the long game. I dig the quote James. Would love to read the book.

[Medway Tai Chi Society]

Awesome.
My daughter joins in with my training sometimes. She loves the form and bag work.

[Martin Austwick]

Sorry to hear you've lost a gifted student, it sucks when that happens. I thought I'd lost someone at about that age. She was back about a year later as enthusiastic as ever.

[clouddragon]

Well maybe it's just a phase he is going through, his Grand dad is quite upset about it as he thought the martial arts were a good thing for him and had even bought him a broad sword. To find really good students is like finding diamonds amongst coal. A lot of students come along for a bit of socialising or a little bit of keep fit, which of course is fine with me but those who want to put in that bit extra and reach higher levels are more rare to find. There are many misconceptions about Tai Chi, most health centres add to this with badly taught health classes for relaxation. When people come along and find out it is hard work like any other martial art they leave and join a pottery class or flower arranging course. Keeping young ones interested is even harder, I had one quit right away before because we didn't wear pyjamas or have belts showing what grade we are. It didn't matter about the quality of the lessons some want to dress up and look like martial artists rather than actually be martial artists.

[Medway Tai Chi Society]

Don't worry about it.

If he comes back, great.

If he doesn't - well, you've got other students to keep you busy.